So, on the table I went for another scan. This one took about an hour, maybe a little more, but they got what they needed and then it was time for Dr. Lacey.

Dr. Lacey came in and remembered me as the woman with the husband who almost passed out. She was actually very fond of that because it humanized Jason in a way she doesn't normally get to see from husbands. 

Then it was time for her to talk. She was concerned. She saw good things from the right side. It's squeezing great. Then she started with the big words again. Words I'm going to have to look up when I'm done typing this! Luckily I was given great advice of taking a notebook to record questions and their answers so that's what I did. It really helped. Anyway, she said this is not a normal case of Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome. It would appear to her that Baby Brother's heart was developing and functioning normally until an "event" occurred. Once this "event" occurred it deadened his left ventricle and stopped developing. This goes back to what ROC said. He has a good size left ventricle, not quite as big as the right but not terribly far off, it just wasn't working. She said she was "unclear what initiated the coronary abnormality but it possibly could have been a heart attack." WAIT! WHAT?? Yes! She said it is very possible my baby had a heart attack and that's what caused his heart to stop. It makes sense. A heart attack is essentially a deadening of the muscles in the heart. But holy cow! So this isn't a typical case of HLHS. Also (because there's always an also) a normal heart is about 1/3 or 30% the size of the chest. My baby's is 40%. This in and of itself isn't horrible news. But coupled with this "event" AND (yes, there's more!) 2 mm of fluid around his heart, they are worried about heart failure. Yes, heart failure. My head was spinning. Interestingly enough I was able to concentrate and take notes but have to admit I'm still unclear about everything. The important thing to remember, she told me, was that he doesn't "have" any of these things she mentioned to me. But these are the signs of something that could possibly be beginning. So naturally they want to monitor me closely and now I have every 2 week appointments with her. I told my family I just need to get an apartment downtown. Seriously, I have to be at the OB, the ROC and now the Cardiologist every two weeks until Baby Brother is born. After that try and get me away from downtown! I'll be a permanent resident at Wolfson's NICU. 

Dr. Lacey said we are now dealing with an unusual case of HLHS along with monitoring me to make sure we don't find Cardiomegaly, Pericardial Effusion and Hyrops Fetalis. I'm not even positive she was speaking English! She reminded me we spoke about a heart transplant, which we turned down in favor of the 3 step procedures, and that transplant still has it's complications. Then she said something else and mentioned transplant again. But never came out and said, look I'm recommending transplant. She also said she is having a board meeting on Thursday with her colleagues and will be putting my case on the meeting agenda. She is going to present my case to the other pediatric cardiologists to get their opinions on my case. It is my personal opinion she didn't want to say anything specific until she had the backing and/or opinions of her peers. 

When she finally finished I asked if I could ask my questions now and she smiled and said sure. My questions seemed moot at this point because they all had to do with the 3 step surgeries and I get them impression she is going to tell me at my next appointment that Baby Brother needs a transplant. I'm not even sure that would be bad news. If he indeed had a heart attack and now his heart is growing to sizes it shouldn't then one could assume he has very serious heart trouble and would need a new one. Like I said, my mind was spinning yet again. I was going to walk in there an show Dr. Lacey how smart I had become in 4 weeks. Well played, Dr. Lacey, well played.

Here's looking forward to 2 weeks when I can hear more things I never knew I never knew and asking questions that seem to now be irrelevant.